Five steps to comfortable breastfeeding

People call breastfeeding natural, which quietly suggests it should come easily. In the first weeks it is a skill being learned by two people at once, and one of them is a few days old.

A handful of things make the difference between feeding you can keep up and feeding you endure.

1. Get the latch right first

Everything else follows from this.

A baby who takes only the nipple, instead of a big mouthful of breast, works hard for little milk. You get pain, your baby gets frustrated, and feeds stretch on and on.

Signs the latch needs adjusting:

• Pain all through the feed, beyond the first few seconds
• A nipple that comes out flattened or wedge-shaped
• Clicking sounds while your baby feeds
• Very long feeds with a baby who never seems satisfied

One session with a lactation consultant often fixes what has felt like a problem with milk for a fortnight. Ask at the hospital where you gave birth, many of which run a breastfeeding clinic, or at your klinik kesihatan. It is the most useful hour of help available in the early weeks, and the one most often skipped.

2. Set up your feeding spot before you sit down

A short list, and it matters at 3am.

Nipple cream. Mama's Choice Intensive Nipple Cream moisturises nipple and areola skin and helps prevent cracked nipples, and you do not need to wipe it off before a feed.

Water within reach, because thirst arrives the moment your baby latches.

Something you can eat with one hand.

A bra that opens with one hand, since the other one is holding your baby. The Maternity Nursing Bra is wire-free, with cups that unclip easily and fabric that absorbs sweat in the heat.

A cushion or two, to bring your baby up to you instead of you bending down. Months of bending is what wrecks a back.

A drink to look forward to. Mama's Choice Almond Boost is a chocolate or matcha almond drink made for breastfeeding mothers, with almond, dates, fenugreek, katuk leaf and banana blossom. Each 30 g sachet is measured out, so a warm cup takes a minute to make during a quiet night feed. It is halal certified by JAKIM.

3. Ask for help, both kinds

Practical help. Someone else can do the laundry, cook, or hold your baby while you sleep. In Malaysia that may be your mother, your mother-in-law or a confinement lady during pantang, and still people rarely offer something specific. Asking for something specific works better than waiting.

Professional help. A lactation consultant, nurse or doctor for anything to do with pain, your baby's weight or your milk. Waiting to see is an understandable instinct, and it usually makes things harder.

4. Make the sitting bearable

Feeds take a long time in the early weeks. A mother stuck in a chair with nothing to do has a much worse time than one with a book, a drama on her phone or a friend on a call.

That is a serious suggestion. Feeding fills a large part of your day for months, and the mothers who find it sustainable are often the ones who stopped fighting the sitting still.

5. Let feeds be your rest too

The hormones released while you feed have a calming effect on you as well as your baby. For many mothers, feeds become the quietest part of the day.

They are worth protecting, so try not to fill them with jobs.

What food has to do with it

Breastfeeding raises how much energy your body needs. The US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention puts it at roughly 330 to 400 extra kilocalories a day for a well-nourished mother, which is a real amount of food at a time when nobody has a moment to cook. Regular meals, a varied diet and plenty of fluids matter more than any single food.

How much milk you make depends mainly on how often and how well your breasts are emptied. Frequent feeds and a good latch do that work.

Get help quickly if

• Your baby is not gaining weight as expected at the klinik kesihatan weigh-ins
• Fewer than six wet diapers a day after the first week
• Pain right through every feed
• Nipples cracked to the point of bleeding
• A breast that is red, hot and painful, with a fever
• Low mood or anxiety that has lasted more than a fortnight

That last one matters as much as the others and is raised the least. Tell your doctor or klinik kesihatan nurse. You can also call Talian Kasih on 15999, or Befrienders KL on 03-7627 2929 if you are having thoughts of harming yourself. In an emergency, call 999.

For a sore start, our guides to nipple care while breastfeeding and easing breastfeeding pain go further.